Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Excuses

There is a joke I heard recently.
There are three excuses for a bochur.
  1. I watched it on a plane.
  2. That's how it grew in.
  3. She's my cousin.
An actual Ra'ya (that's 'proof' in Hebrew, but it's hard to transliterate) to this is from last week's parsha.
When Ya'akov came to the well, he saw Rochel, and it says he kissed her.
Rashi explains it was because "they were cousins".
(But that didn't stop them from getting married, did it???)

Matisyahu

A little while ago, Matisyahu the rapper came to our yeshiva to daven shacharis. Of course, nobody in mesivta knew about it, because he was davening in Zal. I happened to see him when I was looking for my gemara.
When seder started for mesivta, after breakfast, I told my guys that I learn with, "By the way, you know Matisyahu is here, right?"
One of the bochurim got really excited. He asked to leave, but I told him we had seder. He ran off anyway, telling me he'd be back soon.
A few minutes later he came back, huffing, and a little sweaty.
"Did you see him?" I asked.
"Nope. I went into zal, but they told me I just missed him!!"
"Then why are you so out of breath?"
"Well, I went around through the parking lot and I had to open the gate for this guy who didn't know the code."
-At this point, I already knew. The irony was to such an extent, that it had to be true. For humor's sake.-
I then smiled to myself, and asked him seriously, "Oh. And what did he look like?"
"I don't know... he had a high hair line, and a beard like this...."
I smiled at that point, and let it sink in.
"OHHH, noooo!!! Was that matisyahu!!?????"
"Yep."
He cried out in disbelief. "And I wanted to talk to him and shake his hand!!!!"

That was the best irony I was Zocheh to witness in a long time.

Confused at the Kosel

When I was at the Kosel, on my trip to Israel, I was a bit confused and depressed at what I saw. Or better, at what I didn't see.
I expected to see hundreds of different guys with long peyos tapping people on the shoulder and saying, "Rabbi, don't you recognize me?" I mean, that's how every single story ends, so I thought I'd get to see one in real life.
After my initial dissapointment, I thought maybe I should tap someone on the shoulder and say the line, just to see how he would react.
I didn't, though.